There's no tragedy in life like the death of a child. Things never get back to the way they were.

Dwight D. Eisenhower

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Thoughts...


I wanted to share thoughts about my morning.




The breeze was blowing and the clouds were rolling. I don't normally walk outside with Joe and the girls as they leave for school...mostly I just watch them leave from the window. This morning, I walked them out, helped them get in the car and watched them drive away. I watched them until they drove so far down the road that I couldn't see them anymore. And then, I thought the same thought that I think almost every morning...what if that was the last time that I see my family in this life?




Life can change so suddenly, certainly without our permission or approval. When I think back to the day of Mark's accident, we were just carrying on as usual. Mark had taken his nap, he had eaten his snack and was just being his very active and cute self. It seemed that nothing could have ruined the great time that we were all having. Safe, responsible, in control...laughter, games, bike riding and sunshine. Who knew??? God knew.




Now, life is different. Reality is, well, real. So, each time I tell my husband and children goodbye, I will know that it may be the last time that I speak to them. Each morning, I will continue to watch them drive away and know a little better the pain of what it would be like to live here without them. Ultimately though, I will leave them in the hands of the One who knows them better than I ever will...the One who loves them more than I can...the One who knows every breath that each of us will take in this life...and the One who is holding my son, gazing upon the sweet face that I will see again soon.


4 comments:

  1. praying for you, Angie! Its so good to hear you share and its good for you! I am so thankful your "thoughts" even go beyond to teh Lord, when our thoughts rest upon Him, we can find a calm, a peace when our emotions are swirling. Have you ever looked at the words of the song, "Like a River Glorious?" We call it Joel's song, because we sang it on Sun. before the unknown of Mon. would be checking in to the hosp at the Dr's urgent request. Some of the words say, "stay upon Jehoveh..." It has an amazing message.

    Cindy

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  2. Oh Angie - what a beautiful blog post about perspective. I know what you mean.

    It's such a blessing to hear that you're continuing to trust our Lord who knows it all and somehow brings beauty from the most painful times.

    I'm so glad I stopped by today.
    Love,
    Lynnette
    Dancing Barefoot on Weathered Ground

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  3. Angie, I think about that too when watching my husband get ready for work or leave the house or walk into the airport...after Bro. David died so suddenly, reality slapped me in the face and I realized each day can be the last...enjoy, appreciate and love like it is the last day..God is in control. Keep hanging in there.

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